McDonald’s Conquers the Belly Button of the World!

What do McDonald’s and Hiram Bingham have in common? They leave a bad taste in Peruvians’ mouths.

Okay, so while McDonald’s has yet to become villified like American Looter Explorer Hiram Bingham in Peru, the International American chain has conquered the sacred city of Cuzco.

And why do I call it the “Belly Button of the World?” Well, that’s what the Inca’s supposedly called it and thus it has stuck like a tongue to a frozen flag pole in the guidebooks.

The newest location of McDonald’s Peru is planted smack dab in the Plaza de Armas of Cuzco. (That would be Cuzco’s main square.)

I can’t complain too much (so far) about McDonald’s down here. The service is better than the States, they have more local condiments (I love my aji amarillo & salsa de rocoto!) and it only makes me go slightly cross eyed. It also beats Bembos which was the Peruvian answer to McDonald’s.

We all know that McDonald’s isn’t about selling hamburgers. Sure, they make a hell of a lot of money selling their synthetic burgers (we all know it ain’t beef they’re packing in them things), but the secret to McDonald’s true success is REAL ESTATE! And what a better way of conquering the world than by conquering HISTORIC patrimony! Hey Starbucks already did it in the Forbidden City in Beijing, why not Peru?!

Soon McDonald’s will have a few new American neighbors, Starbucks and KFC are slated to move into the Imperial City next. Hmmm…maybe that’s why KFC was protecting their secret recipe recently! God only knows how Peruvians LOVE to pirate things! (Yes, it is unstoppable, not even Bill Gates can stop piracy in Peru!)

It’s already BAD enough that Cuzco has the most incredibly highest prices in Peru and some of THE most highest prices in South America. McDonald’s will only be adding to outrageously inflated real estate values and super inflated tourist prices. Not to mention, it may just put a dent in some local businesses. Why pay S/.22 (min.) for “Italian” food in Cuzco when you can get a value meal feast for S/.15?!

On the positive side, maybe those restaurants will have to up their game, i.e. CUSTOMER SERVICE and while it might not be the most nutritional meal option out there, you will certainly make up for indulging your Big Mac attacks when you visit the surrounding ruins. Cuzco is the ultimate kick in the couch-potato pants!

I wonder, will McDonald’s introduce McCuy Nuggets to their menu in honor of their newest conquest?

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